On the field, in front of 100,000 fans and change, the biggest sporting fixture of the year is in the midst of a fraught, technical passage.

Pakistan have got off to a fast start, and India’s two spinners, Ravindra Jadeja and Kuldeep Yadav, have been brought on to stem the flow. The runs dry up, with tight lines and changing speeds making scoring difficult. Babar Azam bides his time, while Mohammad Rizwan gets creative – and lucky – to change the tide. An under-edge scoots for four before he launches to deep mid-wicket. Next over, the scoop is unfurled.

Soon after, India think they have their man. Kuldeep pitches one just in line, and straightens it the merest fraction. Babar sweeps and misses. The finger stays down. DRS reveals it is hitting leg stump, but not quite enough. It’s one of the most fascinating passages of the Cricket World Cup so far. Meanwhile, a 50-year-old man is talking about a breakfast he had 30 years ago.

Sachin Tendulkar on the microphone for an India-Pakistan clash. It should make sense. But this is really one of those times when you can let the cricket speak for itself, or at the very least, actually speak about the cricket. Tendulkar is many things. A visionary, a genius, one of the most purely talented and dedicated sportspeople to have graced the planet. But an orator he is not. His commentary stint is a Little Disasterclass. He talks over every delivery – a cardinal sin – and so rarely about what’s going on on the field. Instead, he delivers anecdotes that barely qualify for the title and dwells on one of the very few opinions he does have – that ODIs should, for some reason, be split into blocks of 25 overs, but still with 10 wickets per side.

As one commenter quipped on social media, Sachin used to make fans turn off when he got out, but now he does the same when he picks up the mic.

Somewhere between “Ayyo, Sachin Tendulkar got out, switch off the tv” and “Ayyo Sachin Tendulkar got in to the comm box, switch off the tv” we grew up.

— notytony (@notytony) October 14, 2023

It’s not as if we weren’t warned, with Tendulkar joining the team – he is not part of the official panel for the event – for the opening game, to deliver a similarly enervating passage. There is a time and a place for his insight as well, which can be fascinating on the mechanics of batting. A mid-game interval would be the perfect setting to really dig deep into the great man’s career. But when the cricket is this gripping, can we please put story time to bed?

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